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military rules for non-military personnel
« on: Mar 29, 03, 11:05:13 am CST »

Military Rules for the Non-Military Personnel

Dear Civilians,
We know that the current state of affairs in our great nation have many
civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those of you who
can't join, you can still lend a hand. Here are a few of the areas we would
like your assistance:

1) The next time you see an adult talking (or wearing a hat) during the
playing of the National Anthem ... kick their ass.

2) When you witness firsthand someone burning the American Flag in
protest... kick their ass.

3) Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the highest
amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing otherwise,
quietly pull them aside and explain how these Veterans fought for the very
freedom they bask in every second. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices
these Veterans made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a
Disabled Veteran kicks their ass.

4) (GUYS) If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were.
Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDU's), telling others that you used to be
"Special Forces," and collecting GI Joe memorabilia, might have been okay if
you were still seven. Now, it will only make you look stupid and get your
ass kicked.

5) Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, "Do you
fly a jet?" Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such ignorance
deserves an ass kicking (children are exempt).

6) If you witness someone calling the U.S. Coast Guard non military, inform
them of their mistake...and kick their ass.

7) Roseanne Barr's singing of the National Anthem is not a blooper...it was
a disgrace and disrespectful. Laugh, and sooner or later your ass will be

8) Next time Old Glory (U.S. flag) prances by during a parade, get on our
damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart.
Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying
her...of course, failure to do either of those could earn you a severe ass

9) What Jane Fonda did during the Vietnam War makes her the enemy. The
proper word to describe her is "traitor." Just mention her nomination for
"Woman of the Year" and get your ass kicked.

10) Don't try to discuss politics with a military member or a veteran. We
are Americans and we all bleed the same regardless of our party affiliation.
Our Chain of Command, is to include our commander in Chief. The President
(for those who didn't know) is our CIC regardless of political party. We
have no inside track on what happens inside those big important buildings
where all those representatives" meet. All we know is that when those
civilian representatives screw up the situation, they call upon the military
to go straighten it out. The military member might direct you to Oliver
North. (I can see him kicking your ass already.)

11) "Your mama wears combat boots" never made sense to me ... stop saying
it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and therefore, could kick
your ass!

12) Bin Laden and the Taliban are not communists, so stop saying "Let's go
kill those Commie's!!!" And stop asking us where he is!!!! Crystal balls are
not standard issue in the military. That reminds me ... if you see anyone
calling those damn psychic phone numbers; let me know, so I can go kick
their ass.

13) Flyboy (Air Force), Jar Head (Marines), Grunt (Army), Squid (Navy) etc,
are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a
service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them. That could
get your ass kicked.

14) Last but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military,
support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and religious
holiday that you enjoy with family and friends, please remember that there
are literally thousands of sailors and troops far from home wishing they
could be with their families. Thank God for our military and the sacrifices
they make every day. Without them, our country would get its ass kicked.

- "It is the soldier, not the reporter who has given us the freedom of the

- It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of

- It is the soldier, not the campus organizer, who gives us the freedom to

- It is the soldier who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and
whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the

(Authored by:)
Father Dennis Edward O'Brien, Sergeant, USMC

(Please pass this on so I won't have to kick your ass!)
"It is better to die for something then to live for nothing"
"A wise man once said a pen is mightier than a sword, Im pretty sure he had a pen up his ass because if it were a sword, he wouldnt be saying that."

King of the typos

Capt Bob

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military rules for non-military personnel
« Reply #1 on: Mar 29, 03, 03:28:31 pm CST »

Reminds me of the many times I was in uniform with the "civies". They were more than happy to take my money, but frowned on the fact that I was in uniform.

Soldiers (AF, GI, Squids, or Shrapnel Chatchers) are great to have around to spend their money, just as long as we don't show up in uniform.

I was in ROTC headed for an FTX. As I was headed to the table in the cafeteria, to join some other cadets, some athletic type bellowed out "Heil Hitler!" to me. I froze, turned, and set my try next to his. Calmly, and in a loud volume, asked if his father was in WW II. He said that he was, then I asked him, " the next time you're are home, tell your father that you say a guy in a U.S. Army uniform, and that you said 'Heil Hitler!' to him. If and when you're able to come back to college, let me know what he did to you."

I picked up my tray and joined my fellow cadets. There wasn't a sound within 30 feet.

I never heard a word again in that cafeteria any time I wore I uniform.
Capt. Stamina
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military rules for non-military personnel
« Reply #2 on: Mar 30, 03, 02:48:05 pm CST »

Oh if only we could just kick their asses....However, another great thing our soldiers ensured is that people can prosecute for such a thing....

DAMMIT!!! :lol:

In any event, this is awesome!!
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military rules for non-military personnel
« Reply #3 on: Apr 04, 03, 04:36:41 am CST »

Oh how I wish I could receive $$$ everytime someone asked me "do you fly?"...

My response to those people are: "Well, yes I do; I fly a desk" since I'm in an HR position.
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