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The 6th Rogue

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Fun with speeding tickets and other tales involving police
« on: Dec 29, 04, 01:57:46 pm CST »

So I was typing up a response to a thread on another site about speeding tickets and I thought I'd share it here since it's kind of a funny story (and totally true).  The other board won't let a thread get posted if it doesn't pass their profanty filter, fucking nambypambies, so I typed it up with edited language.  Have a read and then share your own stories of fun with situations involving the police:

Yeah, it's a shame where there's a bad case of "I own your a$$" on one side or the other of a traffic stop because it always exacerbates the situation.  If the officer has that kind of attitude then there's an unfair (and usually unavoidable) amount of punishment that comes down on the driver.  If it's the driver’s case then it's taken as carte blanche by the officer to ride riot all over them.  

I don't lose my temper much over anything.  It's almost always not worth it.  Case in point on how it saved my butt:

I was living in LA and driving a beat up, dented, ugly '78 Camaro.  I have long hair and so did the other two guys in the car.  Officer Tweedy (I snit you not, that was his name) pulls me over mere feet from the entry ramp to I-10.  It's the middle of the afternoon.  He demands in a very aggressive and rude fashion all our ID's and my vehicle reg.  He then goes through each one and quizzes us one at a time as to the contents of the ID's.  He does this repeatedly with interspersed zingers of "What drugs are you on?" and "When was the last time you were arrested?"  Nice hunh?  It gets more fun, keep reading.  

Officer Tweedy stalks off after 14 minutes of questioning (I was noting the time on my car's radio clock) and one of my friends in the car starts to gripe.  I tell them both that they will remain perfectly innocent and patient gentlemen because if I get any tickets because of them they'll be paying them.  "Besides," I added, "it'll really burn his (Officer Tweedy's) balls if we provide him with no reasons at all to go further than bullying us unprofessionally."  They concurred as he sprinted back from his car to us to immediately demand "What were you just talking about?"  I told him that we were discussing if it was against the law for me shut off the car while we were pulled over since gas is expensive."  A bit disingenuous I admit but it worked as a cover.  He ordered me to shut the car off because we were "going to be here for a long, long while."

The questioning restarts and it's the same stuff again.  Our answers don't change at all since we're telling the truth.  One of my passengers had a ID and not a Driver's License since a medical condition doesn't allow him to drive.  Officer Tweedy was positive he had lost his license for something and was hiding it.  My friend simply said "I thought you'd run our ID's when you went back to the car.  IF you did you'd see I've NEVER had a driver's license."

This buffoonery continues with us in the car and Officer Tweedy riding us for, I poop you not, an hour and 12 minutes.  Like I said before:  I was watching my radio's clock.  

I finally say "Officer Tweedy, no disrespect but could you please tell me why I was pulled over?  I only pulled out of the mall there a few hundred feet back."  He glares at me and then says "Your license plate light it out."  It was 2 in the afternoon on a clear day.  WTF?  He starts grilling me harder and starts adding questions like asking how long I've owned the car, how many times I've been in accidents, if drugs or alcohol was involved, how much I drink and where...the list goes on.  I was being patient, barely, and waiting for a news van to show up and film a story on police stupidity or something at this point.  This was only a couple of yeas after the whole Rodney King thing and the press was still hot and bothered to find fault with local law enforcement.  Officer Tweedy has gone back to his car a total of three times.  Another two police vehicles have shown up by now and we’ve drawn a crowd of onlookers.  Not once has he had any of us out of the car or asked to search the vehicle or anything; just a load of the same questions, a bit of yelling at us and a lot of posturing.  I was wondering if, after this is over, we should go back to the mal for dinner since this started right after we left the mall we had lunch in.  

Obviously God takes punishing the annoying almost as seriously as he takes punishing the stupid because He intervened as we got near the hour and half point – some of the people rubber necking our little soap opera of one angry cop and three pleasant suspects rammed into each other.  3 car pile up and two of those drivers were certainly watching us.  Officer Tweedy hears the crash, straightens up, curses under his breath and looks away from us.  His shoulders visibly slump as he sees the wreck which, I feel, was totally his fault and he looks at us and says “wait here.?  Like we have a choice since he still has our paperwork in his hand.  He stomps over with a few of the other officers and they calm down the people involved in the accident with a  combination of politeness and telling people to sit down on the side of the road at gun point.  Yes, one person was so irate he forced an officer to draw his pistol and indicate that the civilian needs to sit down on the curb or he can site down in a pair of cuffs in the back of one of the cars.

Officer Tweedy then returns and says “Well, I guess I’m going to have to let you go since something else came up.  I’d better not catch any of you doing anything wrong…?  He then has us say our full names which he compares one last time to each ID he’s holding.  The then throws them in my lap and waves me to drive on.  We’re not even passed the on ramp to I-10 before all three of us are talking animatedly about what an ass Officer Tweedy was.  We high tailed it back to one friend’s house and told the whole story to unbelieving ears.  I then got up and said I was going to the local police precinct and lodging a complaint.  Of the three of us I was the only one that went.  

I filed a full report and said I didn’t want to press charges since the officer was nothing more than rude and unrealistic.  I just wanted it on his record that he caused an accident because he was acting the way he did.  I received a phone call a few months later that the officer was up on charges and I might get a call as a witness for the prosecution that the officer was unfit for duty.  I never heard anything else but I’m hoping that he’s a low man mall security guard somewhere now.  Am I being petty in hoping for that?
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Lukas VonSkull

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« Reply #1 on: Dec 29, 04, 02:52:18 pm CST »

Wow, I agree totally with you! Cops are total @#%!$&*#!
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The 6th Rogue

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« Reply #2 on: Dec 29, 04, 02:53:22 pm CST »

Not all.  Just a small number of asshats.  Most cops are really good guys.
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« Reply #3 on: Dec 29, 04, 03:11:50 pm CST »

Quote from: "Lukas VonSkull"
Wow, I agree totally with you! Cops are total @#%!$&*#!

That's an ignorant statement based on conjecture and, at best, a lack of understanding that you can't generically call a group of people @#%!$&*#! as a whole...

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Lukas VonSkull

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« Reply #4 on: Dec 29, 04, 03:36:28 pm CST »

I've never been arrested. But (I've dealt/ talked/grew up with) to many and still want to generalize they are 99% evil @&$^!

They are not like Fire fighters who want to save lives!  

Police only want to push people around and be in control.  ::fdevil::
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« Reply #5 on: Dec 29, 04, 03:39:12 pm CST »

Quote from: "Lukas VonSkull"
I've never been arrested. But (I've dealt/ talked/grew up with) to many and still want to generalize they are 99% evil @&$^!

They are not like Fire fighters who want to save lives!  

Police only want to push people around and be in control.  ::fdevil::


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brennan

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« Reply #6 on: Dec 29, 04, 03:45:52 pm CST »

Quote from: "Lukas VonSkull"
I've never been arrested. But (I've dealt/ talked/grew up with) to many and still want to generalize they are 99% evil @&$^!

They are not like Fire fighters who want to save lives!  

Police only want to push people around and be in control.  ::fdevil::


I can't say I'm a fan of interacting with cops... as it usually means I'm in trouble. That said, the vast majority of police are decent people.  Kill yourself.  No pictures... no nothing.  Just smarten up or die.
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Lukas VonSkull

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« Reply #7 on: Dec 29, 04, 05:06:59 pm CST »

Jack said:

You Can't Handle The Truth!
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Lukas VonSkull  
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« Reply #8 on: Dec 29, 04, 05:13:56 pm CST »

Quote from: "Lukas VonSkull"
Jack said:

You Can't Handle The Truth!


I said "You're a dumb piece of shit that gives this guild a bad name.  Do everyone a favor, and suck tailpipe for a few hours."
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Dmitri

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« Reply #9 on: Dec 29, 04, 05:14:36 pm CST »

ANd we said we've never met someone so fucking ignorant as to make and belive such moronic blanket statements... SO...

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Dragonfly

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« Reply #10 on: Dec 29, 04, 05:17:26 pm CST »

(You are having entirely too much fun with those pictures.)

6th, to return to the topic, that just flat out sucks. I would've been asking over and over again why that line of questioning was necessary to determine an issue with a broken tail light.
My brother used to get pulled over and harassed all the time, so...we're familiar with certain cops being assholes.
Oddly...I never had that problem. They seem to have no issue with me if I smile at them and apologize for whatever I did.  :roll:
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Lukas VonSkull

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« Reply #11 on: Dec 29, 04, 05:29:50 pm CST »

Geesss....
I thought we were all playing.

The way everyone is around here I thought I was suposed to get you all mad at me by saying totally crazy things!

Can't please you people!

Just joking. Get a life!  ::2guns::
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« Reply #12 on: Dec 29, 04, 10:47:55 pm CST »

Effect

Quote from: "Dragonfly"
They seem to have no issue with me if I smile at them and apologize for whatever I did.  :roll:


Cause

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Muffin McFeelie

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« Reply #13 on: Dec 29, 04, 11:45:10 pm CST »

I am sorry, 99% of cops are evil?

Who the fuck do you think you are fucking talking to you piece of shit.

Are you that fucking thick headed?  What the fuck do you do for a living nut waste?

I take offense to that statement since, I study with cops, I am taught by cops and amd friends with many cops.  Forget what my relative and husband do for a fucking living.

You little anti-authority hating scumbag.  
What happened, when you were 15 a cop told you not to skate ont he sidewalk?  Huh, come on what did they do to you?  Some friends itch about speeding tickets?  Come on whay hate cops.....I think I have the two best reasons to hate them EVER, but I do not.  The vast majority of them a great people who care about their towns more then most who live in them.
The are some of the nicest and honest people in the towns.  In fact, case in point...here in my town you mention one cops name and EVERYONE knows him and that he is an asshole.  Even 5 of our friends who ARE cops with him agree ( I say 5 because that is how many we are friends with).  This is a town of 20,000.  we have 17 cops.  One has a bad reputation, and we all know his name....ask people to name the rest of the cops in our town, and most cannot name one other one.

It takes that one shithead to make people think cops are assholes....but the other 16 are wonderful people.

So next time you sit there and listen to someone bitch about how they were pulled over for speeding and how unfair it is, remember, the person pulled over for speeding or a light out or any other of infractions are BREAKING THE LAW.
Now it is one thing to have a cop who is bad, but it is entirely different to blame them all for one bad guy.
There are alwasy one bad apple in every bunch, cops firefighters, bankers, you name it there are bads ones.....

Muffin
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« Reply #14 on: Dec 30, 04, 03:54:42 am CST »

Dimitri, did you just find ebaumsworld, just rediscover it, or have you just decided that funny images speak louder than profanity?

Whatever it is, it's provided me with a few laughs.[/u]
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« Reply #15 on: Dec 30, 04, 09:51:23 am CST »

well i know they rescently posted a section of pictures meant to be used in forums like this
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« Reply #16 on: Dec 30, 04, 09:53:11 am CST »

@ Green Lantern-  :lol:  touche'...didn't think of that.

@ Muffin- *claps* Huzzah...my cousin is a cop and he's the biggest gentleman I've ever met.
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The 6th Rogue

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« Reply #17 on: Dec 30, 04, 12:17:03 pm CST »

Quote from: "Dragonfly"
6th, to return to the topic, that just flat out sucks....why that line of questioning was necessary to determine an issue with a broken tail light...


You misunderstand - it wasn't a broken tail light.  Officer Dipshit's excuse for wasting nealr 90 minutes of my life and causing a car wreck was supposedly over a broken LISCENCE PLATE LIGHT!!!  It was midafternoon on a bright sunny day.  The thing wouldn't have been on in the first place so how would Tweedy know it was broken.

Several of my relatives are policemen, I'm friends with several policemen and sherrif's department staff.  97% of them are all good peeps that just walk out their pimp hand when they get attitude (like we do when Mr Von Emtpy Skull opens his yap) and tend to treat people like people when they get treated like people.  It's the one or two assholes that bring it down for the rest of the bunch.
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King Nerd of Dorkshire.
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Lukas VonSkull

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« Reply #18 on: Dec 30, 04, 07:16:39 pm CST »

Muffin,
I said I was just trying to piss everyone off.

I thought that's what everyone does here.

I really don't think 99% are evil :eek:

Maybe 10%  :lol:

Take a chill
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Lukas VonSkull  
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« Reply #19 on: Dec 30, 04, 07:58:59 pm CST »

Maybe people just piss us off because they are assholes, not because they TRY to shithead...

If you feel the need to intentionally piss us off, then go drive a fucking car through your ass.....

Those who do piss us off do it simply because they are stupid, if one feels the need to do it on purpose, then you are nothing more then an attention whoring drama queen bitch....

now please, don't EVER tell me to "chill"......loser....

Muffin
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