More Debauchery => Bard's Bizarre => Topic started by: unearthlyruler on Dec 09, 01, 09:51:25 pm CST

Title: YEA!!!
Post by: unearthlyruler on Dec 09, 01, 09:51:25 pm CST
Okay guys...
I realize that some of my poems are slightly... ummm... odd...but I do want to see what everybody thinks... so here's a sample...

"Damnit," said Jill, as Jack rolled down the hill.
He tumbled once, He tumbled twice,
His broken crown a sacrifice.
He moaned, he groaned, he tryed to weap,
His body such a broken heap.
She sits and watches her loved one, slide on down that hill,
His lifes just not the same, without his lover Jill.
She sits and watches, for quite a while more,
Just to realize, without him, her life is but a bore.
Now gentle tears stream down her face,
and where hope and love once sat, pain and fear are quickly replaced,
She knows what must be done.
She knows that it it right.
She knows that it is a fate,
She must not try to fight.
She looks down that hill, and feels her heart fastly pump,
To end her pain and suffer,
She only has to jump.

This was inspired while I was reading a childrens book, there are others like it, some better, some more disturbing. But I will leave you with this, and please feel free to tell me what you think.
Title: YEA!!!
Post by: Kurgus on Dec 12, 01, 05:24:21 am CST
I found it interesting and also quite good. Congrats.